Fears A Woman Faces During Pregnancy: A Timeline
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The following blog is something that I wrote in April of 2017 when I was expecting my first child, Graci! We hope you enjoy this post that we pulled out of the archive, and be sure to let us know what you think in the comments below.
Pregnancy Is Scary
When you get pregnant, it’s scary. No matter how prepared you were for your pregnancy, the moment it actually happens, there’s a certain amount of fear.
And you know what?
That’s a good thing! It means you care about the little one that’s growing inside you.
This morning, I was talking to my boyfriend about our pregnancy and the fears that we have both experienced along the way.
Tomorrow, we will be 27 weeks pregnant, and a week from tomorrow, we will officially embark on the final trimester of the pregnancy. This feels like a huge accomplishment, but as you’ll see below, the last trimester brings a whole new bout of fear!
Telling Loved Ones
Personally, our first major fear during our pregnancy was telling our family and close friends. Although we didn’t tell everyone that we knew right away, we did opt to tell our close loved ones as soon as we got the positive pregnancy test. Since our pregnancy happened before we were married, we were worried what others might think. (It really doesn’t matter what other people think about your life choices though! Keep that in mind, from one momma to another!)
Hearing the Heartbeat for the First Time
While this one sounds like it would a moment of celebration in your pregnancy (and it is of course), it is also a scary moment. When your OBGYN puts the doppler on your stomach for the first time, there is a brief second where you are so anxious that they won’t be able to find the thump, thump, thump of your little one’s heartbeat.
Trying to Stay Positive While Awaiting the Security of the Second Trimester
We’ve all heard the statistics of the first trimester that say this is when your rate of miscarriage is highest. On one particular ER visit early in our pregnancy, the nurse told us that the rate of miscarriage during the first trimester is around 20%. We couldn’t believe it.
It is safe to say that I pretty much held my breath through the entirety of the first trimester, hoping beyond hope that my little one would stay-put.
Unfortunately, in our three subsequent pregnancies, we found out just how devastating miscarriage is. Read about our story of recurrent miscarriage and be sure to check out all of our posts about miscarriage.
Announcing the Pregnancy Publicly
Many couples who are expecting opt to not reveal their pregnancies until the second trimester when the rate of miscarriage drops significantly. As I mentioned above, we opted to tell our loved ones right away, but left the public announcement until about 13 weeks (still technically in the first trimester). Our particular reasoning for this decision was that we had decided to keep the pregnancy from my boyfriend’s daughter until Christmas, which fell right at the very end of the first trimester.
Anyway, revealing such a life-changing thing can be very nerve-wrecking. While you may know how you feel about the pregnancy, you can never ever guess what other people are going to say. When my 91-year-old grandmother found out I was pregnant, I was expecting a lecture. But instead, she said simply, “Well I’m glad you didn’t wait until you were older.” Thanks grandma.
Check out our post about when to tell people you’re pregnant!
20 Week Anatomy Scan
Oh man. I was so terrified to go to the mid-point anatomy scan. While we had already seen our baby several times on our doctor’s ultrasound machines, this scan still freaked me out. I knew this would be the time when they would look hard at our baby and take measurements, check for organs and finally tell us for sure what sex our baby was.
Mommas, this one is rough. The entire time our technician was scanning my belly, I was petrified with fear. Was her head the right size? What about her heart? Was everything there?
Goodness. On the bright side, after going through your anatomy scan, you feel so much more prepared for your baby. It’s the first time that you are really getting to know their little bodies that are growing inside of you. I felt like it was a first meeting and what an amazing thing that was!
The Uh-Oh Moment
For me, I was so consumed with the above fears for the first half of my pregnancy that I gave the actual labor and delivery part of the journey little to no thought at all. It was just this hazy thing that came at the end. I needed and wanted to know my baby was okay and developing correctly. That was literally all that I cared about.
Oddly enough, once I got this reassurance at the anatomy scan, my brain suddenly had an uh-oh moment. I suddenly realized that we were half-way through the pregnancy and that the last big milestone was going to be birth. Uh-oh.
Since then, I’ve definitely given more thought to the birthing process, and even imposed an “I don’t want to know” rule for family and friends.
Glucose Test for Gestational Diabetes
When my mother was pregnant with me back in 1989, she was diagnosed with gestational diabetes. I have grown up hearing all about how she could only have one dessert a week and how she always chose to get carrot cake. Yuck.
Anyway, I have yet to do my glucose test, but it is coming up! While this one doesn’t incite the same type of fear that the rest of this list did, I’m not looking forward to it. We’ve all heard horror stories about the super sweet drink and the horrible amount of time that you have to wait in the doctor’s office for them to then test your blood after you’ve consumed the liquid.
I think for me this one doesn’t scare me as much because if there is an issue, my doctor’s are going to help me handle it so that my baby and I are safe for the rest of the pregnancy.
D-Day (I Mean Delivery)
This one is so obvious, I know. The closer I get to our due date, the more I think I am going to be fearing the actual labor and delivery. But, I plan to keep in mind that I’m neither the first, nor the last person to go through this experience and that doctors deliver babies everyday. It’s going to be okay.
Are you pregnant? Or have you been pregnant in the past? What were your worst fears along the way? I’d love to hear from you below!